STUPID QUESTIONS WITH THE SMART ANSWERS

• BOY : May I hold your hand?
  GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy.

• GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me!
  BOY : You love me...

• GIRL : If we become engaged will you give me a ring??
  BOY : Sure, what's your phone number??

• GIRL : I think the poorest people are the happiest.
  BOY : Then marry me and we'll be the happiest couple

• GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this forever.
  BOY : Don't you ever want to improve??
  

• BOY : I love you and I could die for you!
  GIRL : How soon??
  

• BOY : I would go to the end of the world for you!
  GIRL : Yes, but would you stay there??
  

• MAN : You remind me of the sea.
  WOMAN : Because I'm wild, romantic and exciting?
  MAN : NO, because you make me sick.
  

• WIFE : You tell a man something, it goes in one ear and comes out of the other.
  HUSBAND : You tell a woman something: It goes in both ears and comes out of the mouth.
  

• MARY : John says I'm pretty. Andy says I'm ugly.What do u think,Peter?
  PETER : A bit of both. I think you're pretty ugly.
  

• Girlfriend : "...And are you sure you love me and no one else ?"
  Boyfriend : "Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday".
  

• Teacher : "Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon?"
  Pupil : "The moon"..
  Teacher : "Why?"
  Pupil : "The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the sun gives us light only in the day time when we don't need it".
  

• Teacher : "What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?"
  Pupil : "A teacher".
  

• Waiter : "Would you like your coffee black?"
  Customer : "What other colors do you have?"
  

• My father is so old that when he was in school, history was called current affairs.
  

• Teacher : "Sam, you talk a lot !"
  Sam : "It's a family tradition".
  Teacher : "What do you mean?"
  Sam : "Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher".
  Teacher : "What about your mother?"
  Sam : "She's a woman".

• Tom : "How should I convey the news to my father that I've failed?"
  David: "You just send a telegram: Result declared, past year's performance repeated".
  

• Teacher : "Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be showing?"
  Student : "Brotherly love".
  

• Teacher : "Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?"
  Sam : "No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook".
  

• Patient : "What are the chances of my recovering doctor?"
  Doctor : "One hundred percent. Medical records show that nine out of ten people die of the disease you have. Yours is the tenth case I've treated. The others all died".
  

• Teacher : " Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"
  One Student : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day and at the same time."
  

• Teacher : " George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it.Now do you know why his father didn't punish him ?"
  One Student: " Because George still had the axe in is hand."